Friends, I am so sorry for my absence the past few months. It has been a crazy ride, but I am still very much invested in this blog and getting to the bottom of this question. You have my word; this is life and death to me, and I will see it through to the end. I hope you’ll hang in there with me.
A brief recap – The question I want to address in this series is “Does God validate same-sex unions, according to the bible, read in its historical and cultural contexts?”
To me, the question would boil down to whether or not gay marriage is recognized as a valid covenant by God. The answer to this question would dictate whether a sexual relationship inside said marriage is holy or unholy. The bible’s stance on sex – any kind of sex – is that it is unacceptable outside of a marriage covenant. For those who wish to know God and follow Jesus, the covenant must come first. This won’t be the only question we’ll cover, but it is the main one, in my opinion.
There tend to be two main viewpoints in the Christian world when it comes to the question of same-sex unions. For the purpose of this blog, we’ll call them “Traditional” and “Non-traditional.” I doubt I’m the first person to define the terms this way, but I have no one to cite for their original usage, to my knowledge; if you do, please let me know as soon as possible so I can credit them!
I should say that none of what I’m sharing with you here is new research. It’s all from scholars who have done the work for us. My hope in writing a blog is to make the information that is already out there more accessible and time-efficient for those of you who are (for whatever reason) unable get access to or read any of these books in their entirety. I’ll be drawing from 4 main sources: From the Non-traditional side, Colby Martin’s “Unclobber” video series and Matthew Vines’ book, “God and the Gay Christian.” On the traditional side, Preston Sprinkle’s book, “People to Be Loved” and Sam Alberry’s book, “Is God anti-gay?”
To begin, I want to cover what both viewpoints have in common.
1) Both agree that same-sex attraction is not sinful. The idea that attraction in itself is sinful has led to several harmful and sinful behaviors against LGBTQ individuals. Traditionals and Non-traditionals agree; behavior can be sinful, but sexual orientation is not.
2) Both agree that the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing to do with gay men. You can google that.
3) People on both sides display a sincere reverence for The Lord and a desire to know what His word means when it seems to speak on this topic.
4) People on both sides seem to have a problem with the distinction between acceptance and approval. Non-traditionalism says, “To accept gay people fully, you must approve of their decision to marry and affirm it…or you don’t accept them as people.” Traditionalism says, “If you accept LGBT individuals and couples as people, you’re approving of their ‘sinful’ behavior.” I see errors in both of these lines of thinking.
Here is a full disclosure on where I am at: I have gone back and forth over the years on this. Where I stand now, I believe the bible teaches what history and tradition have said it does, which is that the only marriage covenant God honors requires a gender difference.
HOWEVER, I am incredibly reluctant to hold this view, mainly because the thought of forced celibacy – denial of a marriage partnership – to all gay people who wish to follow Jesus is repulsive to me. It seems such a harsh burden to lay on anyone, and I say this having already committed myself to an indefinite season of celibacy and singleness, even if Jesus requires it of me until my dying day. The difference is, no one laid down an ultimatum and said this was the only way I could honor Jesus with my life…but this is what we are telling our gay brothers and sisters. This breaks and burdens me. I cannot yet reconcile it with the loving nature of my God. I pray that the way will become clear as we seek it out together.
I would love to get some input from you, dear readers. Where else do you see the two sides agreeing? Where is our common ground? I’m not asking this to pretend there are not serious differences – that’s the point of this whole blog, is the differences – but I want to get some false preconceptions and arguments out of the way before we dive in. please share your thoughts!
Mismatched Miss 